Why you should think of your wedding invitations like a love poem.

Poetry is a beautiful art form that has been shared between lovers for centuries. Its sonorous, highly specific yet simultaneously simplistic qualities can often hit straight to the heart, connecting with a reader in a way that other art forms cannot. So, why wouldn’t you think about your wedding invitations - which literally communicate a commitment of love between two people - like a love poem?

There are a few components that, in my mind (as a spoken word poet turned wedding stationery artist), make up a good poem. A good poem has beautiful, song-like language that just sounds good, yes. But it’s more than that! It should contain intimate, specific details that end up communicating so much more than if they were generic or overarching (the hit of “I love you” vs. “I love the way your feet twitch when you get excited”). A good poem also has an economy of words, where each word is carefully chosen to be included - or not included! And, it often has a sense of transformation or alchemization - where tragedy is turned to triumph, and the ugly is made beautiful in the telling.

If you want wedding invites that feel poignantly personal, that maybe bring your guests to tears, and that tell the story of your love (which you’ll need to practice for your actual wedding day), here’s how these elements of poetry can play into your invitations.

Beautiful, songlike language - This can look like alliteration or rhyme. Metaphor or simile. Painting a picture with words. Anything other than the usual “so and so requests the honor of your presence.” You are likely spending a lot of money making the invitation look beautiful - so shouldn’t it sound beautiful, too?

Specific details - While this can certainly come from the illustrations and artwork your designer includes, the actual words you choose can get personal as well. Think - quotes pulled from love letters or favorite phrases shared throughout your relationship. Nicknames you have for one another. Details about the venue you’ve chosen or the items you’ve added to the menu. Lyrics from your song. These details will connect to the heart of your guests, helping them feel who you are and how you want to tell you love story. And, if done right, it will also help them connect to their own love stories.

Economy of words - Keep it simple! You don’t want to cram up the page with a bunch of fluff, especially if you are working with a talented stationery artist whose work you want to showcase. Choose words that hold weight, and don’t worry so much about tradition. All you really need to tell people is who the wedding is for, where to be and when, and how to RSVP. The rest is up to your poetic genius!

Transformation - I don’t know about you, but to me, a good love story involves a beginning, middle and end, where the couple has to go through something together to emerge stronger and more united. Okay, I just described the story arc of every rom com ever - but really. While you don’t need to air out your dirty laundry on your wedding invitations (I highly suggest you don’t) there is beauty in sharing the journey you’ve been on together, in big or small ways. Perhaps this is something you save for your wedding day, or more so something that you think about it general (i.e. you don’t have to only share the rosy parts), but if there is a detail that alludes to the journey you’ve been on, know that it is certainly allowed to live in your wedding invitations. Which are, after all, little love poems sent out to all the people you care about, inviting them to celebrate your greatest work of art yet - your marriage.

What to Include in your Wedding Stationery

You’ve probably googled this before and given yourself a minor aneurysm. There’s a lot that can go into wedding stationery - but I’m here to remind you that not everything has to. Take a deep breath. Remember - it’s 2024. You did not hire Emily Post as your wedding planner. This is your wedding, and you only have to include what feels important to YOU (and 1-2 people whose opinion really matters to you, like your fiancé and your mom, for example).

These days there are so many different ways people approach their invitations - from sending digital invites with music accompanying, to putting all the info on their wedding website that they send out in an email, to sending out full invitation suites that they design themselves on Minted. There is so much variety, which can feel overwhelming - but it doesn’t have to! It also means that there’s room for you and your fiance to have the wedding - and the wedding stationery - that feels like you.

That said, if you’re here, you’re probably the old fashioned type that likes receiving and sending a paper invite, and you’re hopefully looking for something a little more personal and fun than the classic invitations you’re used to seeing. If that’s you, I’m glad you’re here! I’m going to break down what goes into wedding stationery, and give you my two cents on what to send and when.

Before the Day Goods - Surprise! This is everything that goes out before your wedding day, typically in two installments.

-Save the Date - These should go out one year to six months before your wedding. The earlier the better, especially for destination weddings, so that people have time to plan their travel, book their accommodations, all that good stuff. As with the title, these are meant for people to “save the date” for your wedding, so don’t feel like you have to have your entire wedding planned out before you send these.

The invite itself is usually postcard style, including the couple’s name, date and location of your wedding - along with a link to your wedding website as well (if you have one). Stylistically I like to keep these on the simpler side (such as with a portrait of the venue) and leave the bulk of the design for the main invitation.

-Invitation - This goes out roughly four months to six weeks before your wedding. Again, the sooner the better, especially if your wedding requires travel.

At this point, you should have more of a sense of where all of your wedding events are happening, what kind of vibe you want, attire, etc, and your invite is an opportunity to welcome people into that vibe. It should get people excited, and if you work with me, at least one person should want to frame it (I hope). It can also serve as a reminder for people to finalize their travel plans if need be, an opportunity to fill them in on important details, and an encouragement for their RSVP.

Many pieces can go into this - not only the formal “please join us for the marriage of so and so,” but also a schedule of events cards, RSVP card, maps, invites to other more “exclusive” events like a rehearsal dinner, etc. Again, you can really play around with what you want to include here - but my Standard package covers the basics of what I think every couple needs.

On The Day Goods - This includes all of the signage and paper goods needed on your wedding day. It’s an opportunity to incorporate the design from your invitations to give your guests a cohesive feel, and to fill people in on all the things (like what they’re eating, drinking, listening to, etc). This can include but is not limited to:

-Ceremony Program

-Drink Menu

-Dinner Menu

-Table Signs

-Welcome Sign

-Escort Cards

-Place Cards

After the Day - This is your thank you notes! These can go out up to one year after your wedding day, but I suggest getting started once you return from your honeymoon (if you go on one). It’s a great way to keep the memory of your wedding alive, and thus I think the actual note you send should reflect that memory as well - with an illustration of your florals, or a photo of you and your new spouse, or a continuation of your invitation design. Need a last minute thank you note made just for you? I’ve got a custom greeting card set option on my website separate from my wedding stationery packages to get you going, and would love to work with you.

The moral of the story? Do what feels good to you, while thinking of your guests’ experience throughout the process. This is your wedding, and people will remember and enjoy the things that felt like you, not like what Emily Post told you to do.

Yours Truly,

Sage